Lesson Learned by Alicia Keys

Sitting here...just thinking. life is full of surprises, disappointments, ups and downs and everything else you can think of. But more than anything is full of mistakes and lessons learned.

I keep thinking that one day I'll wake up and everything is ok...you know have a healthy relationship with whomever I'm dating, everything is cool with my fam, I'm not struggling tryna find a job and tryna get back into school and so much more, but I guess this was the life I was given and I gotta make the best of it...

I've made this one mistake so many times before...but its time for a change...I mean why is it that there are dudes out there, that if I said today lets give a relationship a try, they would say ok, but I'm stuck here with you? You say you try but all it seems like you do is try to hurt me...I just can't do it...my sanity, health and well being is more important at this point. It just hurts to know that I loved you and even though I was cautious, I was still trying and for it to come down to this...mhm

On To The Next One by Jay-Z

Ha Ha Ha Ha...niggaz think shyt is soooooo cute...just like the title of this post says...I'm on to the next one, cuz niggaz aka TERRANCE MICHAEL COLLIN COLLYMORE...be playing games...I done said it before, but now I mean it. Go on to them otha bytches, cuz I am too thru...Hope they were worth with...

Love by Musiq Soulchild

Ahhh fresh out the shower, after being a bum all day...HAPPY VALENTINE'S DAY to all...whether you single or in a relationship...

Before I got in the shower, I had the urge to get off what was on my mind...this valentine's was different because one, i did completely nothing and it feels different. Maybe its the older I get, holidays, or days in general just don't feel the way they once did. I mean I am not upset about the way my day turned out, but I mean who wouldn't just wanna lay in your significant other's arm and just chill. But either way its all good.

Valentine's day is a very commercial "holiday". Franchises and businesses make millions of dollars because of this one specific day. Don't show me how much you love me one day outta the year. Thats like me having sex with you one day outta the year...yea I know where they do that at? LOL...

Iono...I guess I'm just getting older and am coming into my own...Love aint what it used to be. You see old couples still together after so many decades...still holding hands and whatnot...now thats the love I want. Now a days people say they love one another because they think it sounds cute, took get what they want and for whateva else reason other than because they really mean it.

Love is a concept that is often misused, misconstrued and misunderstood...just like Musiq said "Love, so many people use your name in vain" ...will i ever find that lifelong love...that real love Mary J was talkin bout??? who knows...

A friend of mine once told me that L.O.V.E stands for Level Of Valued Emotions...how deep is your love for me?

Unthinkable (I'm Ready) by Alicia Keys ft. Drake

Ok so im sitting here watching My Wife and Kids and just thinking to myself. Why is it that my relationships never seem to work out? Like im thinking bout my last relationship and he lied to me. Then he began to hide shyt from me. All he seems to do is party, meet chicks and who knows what else. Now mind you im not insecure, although i may be a lil jealous at times. But i feel like niggaz these days don't even know what they want nowadays. You claim you got a good girl, one whom you love and all of the above, and yet they still talk to other girls, flirt with other girl, lie, and hide shyt. im the type to put my all in and all i seem to be getting are lames...i mean is there something wrong with me? mhm just wondering

Tie Me Down by New Boys ft. Ray J

Dzumb tight, cuz I woke up early and left the house and couldnt even do what I had to do....but anywayz...

Okay so after watching For the Love of Ray J reunion last night, I dont know what to think. Ok so I was rooting for Mz Berry to win because she proved to be the most established female in the house and she had her shyt together. But after watching the reunion, it seems as if Ray J wished he had kept Jaguar around a bit longer. MHM...SMH, I mean I liked Jaguar as well, so who knows what would have happened if she had stayed. But what tripped me out was that Cocktail (from season 1) had come back and was telling Mz Berry how things went down with her and Ray...at that point I believed Mz Berry to be a bit naive in that she was defending Ray and he didnt deny anything Cocoktail had said. Like not for nothing, if he chose Mz Berry, why is he hittin up the other females and whatnot? Like ok yea u can hit them up but why before u hit up the girl u chose? Like what sense does that make? I mean I do believe what Cocktail was saying...Ray is not ready to settle down, just like many guys....so I mean I guess there will be a For the Love of Ray J 3...

I Get Crazy by Nicki Minaj

Well well well...seems like I've forgotten about ya, but not really. Just dealing with a few things.

HAPPY NEW YEARS!!! New year, new beginnings right?

LOL...I'm ready for a new beginning... broke up with the boyfriend, so I'm starting the new year drama free. Beginning a new school in the fall...made a few new friends...looking forward to a new job (if it comes thru like its supposed to)...I feel good...


Until next time...